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what a weekend

September 18th, 2005 at 07:35 pm

Sorry to be a little off-topic, finances wise...but...

Did you ever hear the song (which I believe is relatively new) by Sum 41, called 'Untitled'? It's a really good song, and probably fits exactly how my sister feels right now. She is having alot of problems with her husband, she recently enrolled in a nursing program, great opportunity, and he is a jerk, always has been, doesn't want her to better herself. His male ego can't handle it. I received a call from her last night, she had gone to my parents' house for the night. They even had to pick her up - her wonderful husband apparently told her to clean out her minivan because he sold it, and proceeded to take her keys and leave. (A little background on this is when they went to buy the van, she couldn't find her license - therefore the van was put in his name. In a later fight he told her he did this on purpose so if she left him she wouldn't have a vehicle. Nice, right?) This is a perfect example of how he is trying to stop her from bettering herself - this behavior starts whenever she does try. Selling her car? Perfect way to stop her from going to school, since she can't get there! Apparently he really did not sell it, but still an idiotic gesture (not that I expect more of him).

She stayed at my parents' house last night to cool down, and will be contacting a lawyer to see what her options are (she wants a divorce obviously). This guy is as smart as a fox - everything that is paid is in his name, any debt is in hers. I can't even talk to my sister, because Mr. Paranoid tapes conversations... monitors her email... the list goes on. She told me last night she gave my father money, and he is going to set up an account for her. She went back home today, because her kids were understandably upset that she was gone, and said she will try to remain civil for the time being, until she knows what she can do. She has quite a rough road ahead of her: finding a job, securing daycare, getting a vehicle if idiot plays games with the van again, which he will, finding somewhere to live, all while dealing with the hell we know he'll put her through. I know my parents will help her as much as possible, but they live on a fixed income now since my father retired. I told her I set up an account for her as well, and I think at least half, if not more, of my second income will be going to her. It's so worth it though, if she will be happy. I really hope anyone out there with doubts about their relationship will see this post and think twice about kids and marriage with that person. Love isn't enough sometimes, and even that wears away when you have to deal with things like this.


The rest of the weekend was okay, just went by so fast. Sorry to say with everything going on, we missed the carnival from work. Nick's knee also was bothering him, so he wasn't exactly in the mood to go anywhere, let alone walk around. I felt the same. We went shopping to that clothing store, Dots, yesterday and I got 5 shirts and a pair of pants for $81! What a difference, and they are really nice clothes. We also stopped by the AJ Wright next door, and Nick got a pair of jeans (which just happen to be Guess, and really nice) for $20, as well as sneakers, which he needed since he currently had none. Those were $35. Afterwards we stopped by Wendy's (my request, since we hadn't had it in quite awhile) and I got the chicken strips salad, so yes I stayed healthy (by Wendy's standards anyhow!) I also worked out last night. Not going to work out tonight since I am really sore, but I am encouraged because it looks like I dropped another pound. I just scheduled payment for the Sears card to be paid in full on Thursday (that I had used to buy work clothes last week), and transferred $7 to my Money Earned account in ING ($5 from Pinecone Research and $2 from SurveyDirect). So far I have about $130 in there. I haven't transferred all the money though, I still 'owe' my account. I keep a spreadsheet to track what I earn and if I deposited it into savings yet.

I think I mentioned previously that I am loosening up as far as the weekly spending - we try not to spend money as it is, and as much as I analyze it, it's not going to prevent necessary spending. If we were going out and buying big-screen TV's every week, okay then, I'd have a reason to cut back and criticize, but I think we're doing okay, on the right track. We're still good on the groceries we bought 2 weeks ago, although we're going to have to get a few items soon. Anyway, time for me to get off my butt and do some cleaning, and make my lunch/dinner for tomorrow. Already Monday again (groan).

1 Responses to “what a weekend”

  1. Anonymous Says:

    So sorry about your sister. I went through something similar and now that I have the hubby I do, I can't believe how wonderful and blessed I feel in this relationship! Your sis obviously needs to get far away from this dude as he sounds mentally ill. I hope she has the strength for the journey ahead, but at least she has wonderful supportive family members! It will take awhile, but what a relief she will feel when she has her own life back.

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